無法言語.

one more things added into my bucket list!

pei daddy fly to CHINA! and visit our 王氏的祖先！

treat him good food, good accommodation ! and whereever he wants to go..

even though i'm sure wherever he wants to go is definitely somewhere i don feel interested.

k, it motivates me to continue 加油！往目标前进！

背负了好大的责任

想起就怕。。。

只希望现在敢快把想做的事做好

否则以后就没机会了。。。

或许，也或许都无法跳舞。。。。。。Noooooooooooooooooooooo ：（

29 dec 2014

kind of suay today...

forgot that i suppose to work today.

CHUA SAI TTM when my colleague asked if i'm coming

working at 10am and i work up at 9.48!

WELL DONE :(:(

managed to get ready by 10.15 and decided to call for taxi using the app uber!

and of cos... i won spend money over unnecessary stuffs even when i know i'm late. but, since i have $10 credits, i thought i can use it as i assume i won spend more than 10 bucks on cabfare..

i board the atas black cab n theres no meter..

我上了贼车啊！

it took me 27 min to reach my workplace and total fares were freaking $44!

ARE U KIDDING ME?!?!?!?!?

minue $10 will be $33

ARE U STILL BLOODY KIDDING ME?!?!?

hahaha!

not that angry but more of heartpain

and i realise i feel more angry when ppl waste my time as compared to wasting money.

anyway, lesson learnt!! AVOID BLACK TAXI TTM!!

发现我多一个缺点

我是个没自信的人。。。
但当我看到有个实力比我差的人，却自信满满
做一些我都不敢做的事时
我会Judge 他

其实我很怕别人judge 我，
因为我自己也会默默的judge人。。。
但不见得不是件好事啊
就知道他的为人
他的底细

会觉得他没有自知之明，
但其实我是妒忌他有自信

有时还蛮希望自己也会有自信
但。。一定会有人说我
因为我好欺负？
说我不要脸。。。没实力还敢做。。。

总而言之，我太self conscious 了啦！

莫名的想生气

是因为我的性格吗？

hais..
算了。。。看开点

People always think I damn free. Stay at home?
-.-"
People complaining that they dance everyday. Tired. Yea yea..
But I'm grateful to be able to dance everyday ever since exams ends. Yes, I dance everyday. Not almost, but everyday ever since my final exam ends in may. It's a gift though.

Commitments I have now.
Childcare job
Tuition (2)
Koi
Receptionist
Teaching on wed(4 classes)
Sat
Thurs
Sun

Handling 3 dance performances ( I'm the in charge)
One dance video concept project
One competition. Heng, my dance mates doing the job( formation n teaching)
One performance (Fren in charge)

Seriously... My brain is bursting. Spend most of the time thinking of songs, steps, formation.
But I knew I would feel a sense of achievement when I complete it.

Nonetheless, I enjoyed what I'm doing.

Busy? Still ok. I jus like to spend my whole day with things I like

i was talking to my frens about you and you msged me..

i do not how to react neither do i know how i should reply you..
心好痛，真的好痛

class at natasha studio today WAS FUNNNNNN !!

especially kids class!!!
THEY DAMN CUTE OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG !!!
my heart melt ttm..
feel like laughing out when they did smt cute.. but okay... maintain! hahah! even the mother is smiling.

super stress with the hip hop class today.
went home around 1230am last night after esprimere. bath and learnt kpop dance. boyfriend by witch.
agar agar n started choreoing for hip hop.
i realise i can choreo faster at home... living room.... at night
agar agar choreo finish
went to slp at 2 n woke up at 830:(

but i have no idea why i feel so stress up right after kids class
regarding hip hop.
probably cos of what my fren told me last night?
regarding an hip hop instructor from XX studio... standard so so only who cant even catch intermediate class... end up getting judge by hip hop dancers
WA SIBEI STRESS
i stress that i will get judge..
i stress that my frens will come for my class
keep changing my steps over n over again.
is it because of indecisive? idk leiiiii
jus not satisfied with my choreo though it go according to the beat.. n melody
n i thought somehow it will affect my kpop class

but kpop class is still fun!
when i teach, or rather when i dance.. all the stress-ness disappear.
have no idea how to describe but i always enjoyed myself when i teach
as in... i'm really having fun:) jus hoping they can catch my steps

after hip hop class, somehow,... i feel the choreo is ok. probably cos i never totally full out when i dance..
so i feel its ugly when i do the steps.
but i glad the students like it?

i need to learn how to relax...
n stop doubting myself... hais

ESPRIMERE production on sat 6 dec 2014..

initially thought its somehow A BIT waste of time cos it doesnt really help me in dance
but... i was wrong
did learn smt... not in terms of dance...
but... how people work
and how should i not learn/ or learn from them

keep telling myself to be open minded only as i know everyone is learning:)

gaining respect from dancers is very important too.. if not.. they won even :fu cong"

but i'm jus amazed why does it seems that its dwz production instead of singing club production
as in.. is it me? or what
a bit exaggerating
received flower from them when i'm jus a back up dancers
or should i say.. dwz members damn supportive.
we even received presents from choreographer..
????? question marks????
like a bit formal
a bit exagerating ah?
as in... its just a mini performance, but most dwz members went to watch...
machiam production. still got take photo ceremony, give flowers,
a bit amazed.. super shocked.
or maybe its just me...
season alr?
is there such a thing as used to it?

but after reflecting about everything this afternoon..
legit legit..
this might be their virgin performance, first time being choreographer
n that is why they feel so excited. very serious about it.

i guess i will be excited too if i'm able to be a choreographer for recital.
but i doubt i will be over the moon for this performance.

but good job everyone!!!
one commitment down!

I'm not that busy... I jus like to spend my days wisely.. Or rather make full use of my teenage life ?

What I feared most is my studies. I didn have time to study:( hais..

Focus too much on other stuffs, and I'm worried about my finance too. Have not been earning much. Neither did I work at koi now.

But!! I'm not poor. So stop teasing me.

I have dreams, I have future plans so I started saving up since poly. I need to pay school fees, my expenses, my transportation.

Ur have the money to buy branded wallet, yea. From your savings? From your family? Envy? Nope. Cos I'm learning to spend my own money. I'm 21 alr.

Yes, I may say I have no money. But that does not mean I have $0 in my bank.

I'm jus saving up. I don wan to spend on unnecessary stuffs.

Or rather I believe I'm richer than most of my frens. Even after paying for my school fees.

Theres a different!

So.,, stop saying what.. Ah ya Chu hui won spend on branded stuffs. You got so poor not? No life eh. Jus buy only la. Pathetic eh u.

I'm conscious... I kind of mind. What can I reply?